The last few weeks have filled my head so chock full that I haven't been able to focus.
I wrecked my car a few weeks ago, as you may have seen on this blog and elsewhere, and when the officer on the scene asked me what happened (and he actually said, "No seriously. WHAT HAPPENED?") I couldn't really answer. I know that I wasn't paying attention--I was thinking about anything BUT driving.
That morning, I read an email from a friend that consumed my thoughts for most of the day. Before I got in the car to take that last drive (R.I.P. Highlander!), my mom had me watch an episode of Oprah that got me thinking about myself, my free time, and my relationships with others. I planned to run a race the next day. I saw a play the night before and the songs were stuck in my head.
None of these things are reasons to drive my car off the road, I know. It's a horrible excuse, if you can even call it that. And my ability to focus has just gotten worse since then.
Dealing with the insurance to get a new car has been harrowing. I testified in court last Tuesday. Work has been insane the last few weeks; today I couldn't get anything done because I was working on too many things at once.
Tonight I played in a volleyball game and I had to keep reminding myself to pay attention to the ball--I caught myself staring into space more than once (not that I'm really any good at volleyball, internet, but I was worse than EVER tonight).
Even this post is disjointed. My thoughts feel jumbled.
I think I need to get back to yoga--it was definitely something that helped me focus. When I'm not focused, I tend to do things like fall down stairs or sprain my ankle. I miss deadlines and projects are harder to complete.
I'm trying to slow down my brain. The rain tonight helps a little--it's calming and relaxing, and I'm breathing a little deeper. If you have any advice for getting my mind back into a lower gear, I'd love to hear it.
2 comments:
Ok, as someone who has struggled with attention problems my whole life here are my thoughts: Ritalin or Adderall...(just kidding!)
Seriously, here is what my psychiatrist told me: exercise every day--that can be walking, running, yoga, or whatever--just get moving, get a good amount of sleep--make sure you are going to bed early and clearing your mind before bed, maintain a set schedule from day to day (that is actually REALLY important) and pay attention to your diet--don't drink too much caffeine or consume too much sugar. Also, Omega 3 fatty acids really help with focus. Personally, the things that help me the most are exercise, sleep, and maintaing some sort of schedule.
That's it! Sorry this comment is so long.
kate.. i practice mindful meditation. Jon Kabat Zinn has some really good stuff out there. I can copy you a CD if you want. I am practicing being present. I read and try to follow Pema Chodron's work.. being present. Meditation has helped.. when I practice.. it helps. you have reminded me that I have been telling my self to sit today.. it is 215 and I have yet to be still and meditate. Thanks.
Post a Comment